Please don't let my lack of reciprocation or seeking push you away. All of my deepest wounds are based in rejection. Every time I reach out, ask for help or even vaguely position myself to need you, I open myself up to be hurt again in the way that for me defines what it means to hurt. So as I lay in bed, wired on the coffee I drank so that I would have enough alertness to enjoy time with my wife and two close friends, I realize that I desperately try to position myself to not need anyone and continually fail miserably at it.
Though I am unworthy of you, I need you. Though I push you away, I need you. Though I don't give you the credit you deserve and argue with you when you try to bring me truth, I need you. Though I disqualify you in my mind as I find any flaw at all with your logic, attitude or execution of your motives, I need you.
I am not Uncle Sam, and I don't just want you, I need you. I won't make it without you. If you are a follower of Christ and God placed you in my life, I need you. You are God's grace to me, and I desperately need you.
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