Rage Like a Cage
Why am I held by all these things I hate?
So far from my glorious fate
This can't possibly be all there is to me
Cracking clay devoid of all that is Holy
No! It can't be true!
I pledged my life to You
Jumped off a cliff and
Placed all my bets on You
You're all I have and I still feel empty
How long until You pour out on me?
Alone in the dark though inside of me the greatest Light of all hides
Still waiting on my answers from the sky
My claws are bound, not free to fight
Blind to who I really am, in the dark without Your Light
Bear within, Sweet Spirit rise, open my eyes
To how You overcame this death with Your unquenchable Life
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Friday, October 29, 2010
I guess He meant it.
I have always gained more from listening to people who are willing to expose their own weakness than from people who challenge me to push for greatness or whatever. Also, I had someone prophesy to me this summer that God wants me to live my life in the open and let others see my struggles and redemption for the purpose of encouraging the body around me. With that said, I feel the Spirit leading me to make my first serious entry about one of those struggles.
"You husbands likewise, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman, and grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered."
--I Peter 3:7
I have many times found it hard to put others before myself, especially my wife. She's always been the more stable one and emotionally just stronger as well. When we were on the path to getting married, I remember one very specific night where God told me, "She is my grace to you!" Many days I have found it very easy to make it all about me and what I need: my hurts, my struggles, and MY FEELINGS. Sucks for her, right?
Over the past year and a half I have found it absolutely essential in my life with Christ to love my wife. Sounds basic, I know, but I really am that dense and wounded in certain areas. God has sent me this message by being silent with me and letting me feel alone when I am not looking to serve my wife. Just easy simple stuff too, like unloading the dish washer or putting away some laundry. She doesn't ask for much anymore. The first place that I have found I need to look if I am starting to get depressed or feeling distant from God is my marriage. Am I serving her, or just sucking the life out of her with my lack of consideration and respect?
As I write this, I think about how far I still have to go in truly putting others before myself and not taking advantage of people, especially my wife. I thank God for the foundation of this truth that is being laid in my life. May I bring You glory by being a picture of Your love to my family. Please cover my weakness with Your grace and strength. May I know more and more of Your heart as I submit to You.
"You husbands likewise, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman, and grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered."
--I Peter 3:7
I have many times found it hard to put others before myself, especially my wife. She's always been the more stable one and emotionally just stronger as well. When we were on the path to getting married, I remember one very specific night where God told me, "She is my grace to you!" Many days I have found it very easy to make it all about me and what I need: my hurts, my struggles, and MY FEELINGS. Sucks for her, right?
Over the past year and a half I have found it absolutely essential in my life with Christ to love my wife. Sounds basic, I know, but I really am that dense and wounded in certain areas. God has sent me this message by being silent with me and letting me feel alone when I am not looking to serve my wife. Just easy simple stuff too, like unloading the dish washer or putting away some laundry. She doesn't ask for much anymore. The first place that I have found I need to look if I am starting to get depressed or feeling distant from God is my marriage. Am I serving her, or just sucking the life out of her with my lack of consideration and respect?
As I write this, I think about how far I still have to go in truly putting others before myself and not taking advantage of people, especially my wife. I thank God for the foundation of this truth that is being laid in my life. May I bring You glory by being a picture of Your love to my family. Please cover my weakness with Your grace and strength. May I know more and more of Your heart as I submit to You.
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